Complete the following quote from the popular musical, West Side Story:
"I feel ______!"
A. Pretty
B. Average
C. Pretty average
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You've probably seen at least one of
Dove's Real Beauty Campaign videos: The one in which a rather typical looking woman is transformed (by means of multiple stylists, cosmetic
products, and some Photoshop magic) into the sort of model we would
normally see in advertising, or this depiction of women describing
their own looks versus the much more positively described perceptions
of others. I just saw their new segment involving a couple of signs
(“Beautiful” and “Average”) labeling doors, and women
choosing which door they enter. As would be expected, many women did
not identify as “Beautiful,” and as such, chose to walk through
the door marked “Average.” This simple act was foisted as a
tragedy. I disagree.
While I agree that women should love
themselves, I actually don't see feeling beautiful as a requirement
to loving one's self. I certainly don't believe them to be
synonymous. There is also the curious observation that my healthy
perceptions of my own beauty are often indicative of the way I feel
about myself overall, though not necessarily the other way around.
I'm not disputing the claim that we are
all beautiful; I whole-heartedly support this idea. But in a world of
such beautiful individuals, I believe the average (if we could model
such objective concepts mathematically) to still be . . . beautiful.
I find it perfectly acceptable that I identify with the status quo in
a world where the standard level of loveliness is so high.
Besides, if there were multiple entry
options, which door would each of us choose? Given my wide range of
talents, abilities, and strengths (I've deactivated my sarcasm, so
take me seriously!) I would not simplify my “me-ness” to be my
outer shell—beautiful as it may be. Is that okay? Well, I'm okay
with it, and around here, I make the rules. What I truly think
and feel about myself when I'm alone is far more significant than an
arbitrary door chosen when others were looking. A more telling choice
than a publicly declared “Average” or “Beautiful” may be a
privately determined “Beautiful,” “Compassionate,”
“Creative,” “Intelligent,” (etc.) “All of the Above,” or
“None of the Above.” Or, we could get right down to the heart of
what we want to know—“Love myself,” or “What's there to
love?”
This gets a bit deeper and grittier
than the previously selected euphemisms, but if our goal is truly to
find struggling women and help them feel good about themselves, why
pretend? Let's do be real: If we want to make a change, there
are more lasting and substantial ways to boost girls' and women's
self-esteem levels (or, you know, anyone's—regardless of age or
gender). Must all of our lifting be based on [feelings about]
appearances? Let's sink our foundation deeper than that.
So we feel that our looks are average,
or perhaps we think we're beautiful: Let us all walk through that
door with confidence. I'm okay with whatever I may see when I look in
the mirror because I know I am more than can be seen. With my
average looks, my wit that exceeds expectations, and my
satisfactory-level intelligence and kindness (among many other
positive traits), I think I comprise a rather enjoyable package. I
love me, and would invite you to do the same for yourself—regardless
of the doors you may be walking through.
